In the December Community Brainstorm, coaches from various backgrounds shared their experiences and strategies for managing "overbearing" parents who interfere with their child’s training. The responses highlighted the complexity of this issue and provided a diverse range of approaches. Here’s a summary of the key themes that emerged, along with additional insights to help navigate this challenge.

Reframe the Term ‘Overbearing’

Several coaches suggested that the term "overbearing" may need rethinking. One coach noted that times have changed, and parents are often more involved in their children’s activities than in the past. Instead of viewing this as interference, it can be seen as an opportunity to channel their enthusiasm constructively.

💡 Stakeholder Management Tip:

Providing parents with small roles—such as recording competition results or organising recovery snacks—can foster their involvement without disrupting the training process. However, as one coach cautioned, this approach should be monitored to avoid empowering disruptive behaviour.

“I know ‘overbearing’ parents can be tricky, but maybe we need to rethink what that word even means. Times have changed and yes, parents are definitely more involved (or ‘clingy’) than they used to be. But instead of fighting it, what if we found ways to work with it?”

Establish Clear Expectations and Boundaries

Many coaches highlighted the importance of setting clear boundaries from the start. A well-communicated Parent Code of Conduct can outline the roles and expectations of both parents and coaches, ensuring everyone understands their supportive role.

🔑 Key Practice:

Share the code of conduct at the start of the season and during initial meetings with new athletes and their families.
Reinforce it throughout the season to maintain alignment.

One coach shared that their code of conduct improved squad unity and allowed issues to be escalated to the club committee rather than managed solely by coaches.

📝 Example Parent Code of Conduct Template

“Our club introduced a parent code of conduct, outlining respectful communication, positive suport, and boundries with coaches. By setting clear behavoural expectations, parents better understood their suportive role, reducing conflicts and enhancing the training enviroment.”

Communication is Key

Effective communication helps build trust and reduces misunderstandings. Coaches emphasised the need for proactive and structured communication, such as regular updates on training goals and athlete progress.

📢 Practical Tips:

Hold pre-season meetings to discuss long-term development pathways and individual goals.
Set communication “windows” for when parents can raise questions, avoiding spontaneous interruptions during training sessions.

By establishing these communication norms, parents feel informed and included without disrupting the flow of training.

Educate the Parents

One coach shared their philosophy of “education and empowerment,” where parents are invited to observe training and are educated on the reasoning behind each aspect of their child’s program. Providing video analysis and discussing athlete progress helped foster trust and reduced parental concerns.

“Initially this starts with the athletes and explaining why we do what we do – from session prescription, to drills, to recovery, to deloading, to nutrition, to psychology, to goal setting, to debriefing etc. This happens on a regular basis at training. Parents are welcome to listen to and observe sessions. I’ll also include them in discussions that pertain to their child or the overall squad. Through this education I see they come on board and support the process.”

The Importance of Protecting Your Own Well-being

A few responses highlighted the need for coaches to protect their own mental and emotional health. Constant availability can lead to burnout, so setting limits on when and how parents can contact you is crucial for maintaining balance.

🧘 Self-Care Tip:

Prioritise your own well-being by scheduling time for yourself and being comfortable saying "no" to requests outside of your designated communication times.

“It is problematic to be ‘totally’ available to all people as the coach needs to keep a balance in their own lives also and create space for family, friends, interests and their job/role in life.”

Lean on Support Networks

For younger or less experienced coaches, dealing with assertive parents can be intimidating. One young coach shared that seeking guidance and backup from senior coaches gave them the confidence to handle difficult situations.

👥 Advice: Don’t hesitate to reach out for support—whether from senior coaches, club committees, or athletics organisations. Collaboration strengthens your position and provides a consistent response to challenging behaviours.

Enforce Consequences When Needed

While fostering collaboration is ideal, some situations may require firmer action. A private coach shared their two-strike policy: one warning, followed by removal from the squad if behaviour doesn’t improve. This approach, while strict, reinforces that disruptive behaviour won’t be tolerated and protects the squad’s well-being.

Managing parental involvement in athletics coaching requires a careful balance between fostering positive relationships and maintaining professional boundaries. By setting clear expectations, communicating effectively, and involving parents in a structured way, coaches can create a supportive environment that benefits both athletes and their families.

Your role as a coach is to guide, educate, and empower—not just athletes, but sometimes their parents too. As one coach wisely noted, "Parents want the best for their kids, just like we do. It’s about finding that balance where they’re engaged, but in a way that supports the athlete’s journey—without driving us all up the wall!"

Ready to share your expertise with the Athletics Community? Tap here for the January 2025 Community Brainstorm - “Adapting Training in Hot Weather”

Managing Difficult Parents - Advice from the Athletics Coaching Community